Bloomsburg's BEST Hotel? Your Holiday Inn Express Awaits!
Okay, buckle up, buttercups, because we're diving headfirst into the often-overlooked gem of Bloomsburg – the Holiday Inn Express! And let me tell you, after a recent stay, I'm ready to spill the beans (and maybe get a little side-eyed by the front desk for my brutal honesty). Forget those sterile, cookie-cutter reviews. This is the real, messy, often hilarious, and occasionally grumpy truth.
Bloomsburg's BEST Hotel? Hold Your Horses… Let's Talk Holiday Inn Express!
First, the basics. Accessibility is mostly there. Wheelchair accessible rooms? Check. Elevator? Double check. But here's where it gets real. Navigating the hallways sometimes felt like a leisurely stroll through a mildly confusing maze. And while the lobby is all bright and shiny, some of the accessibility features could use a bit more oomph. (More on that later, because, honestly, I get passionately annoyed by this issue).
The "Stuff" - Amenities and Offerings (and My Personal Shenanigans):
Okay, let's run through the laundry list of stuff. Lord have mercy, it's long.
Internet and Tech: Wi-Fi? Yep. Free Wi-Fi? Thank you, sweet baby Jesus! Because, let's be honest, in 2024, if I can't stream cat videos in my pajamas, then what's even the point of life?! I did see some LAN ports in the room, but who even uses those anymore?
Food, Glorious Food: Breakfast is included, hooray and amen! It's the standard Holiday Inn Express buffet. Think: rubbery scrambled eggs, questionable sausage, and those pre-packaged muffins that, despite their shelf-life of a thousand years, somehow taste good. The coffee? Well, it's coffee. (Better than no coffee, folks).
- Anecdote: I was SO ready to hate on the buffet, but then I saw this tiny, elderly woman absolutely devouring a plate of pancakes. She had this look of pure bliss on her face. It was… inspiring. It made me reconsider my cynical breakfast attitude. I tried a pancake. Okay, maybe it was actually pretty decent. I ate two. Don't judge me.
Dining & Drinking: Now, here's where it gets a little… meh. There's no actual restaurant or lounge inside the hotel, per se. You are reliant on what's near, and you know to plan. Thankfully Bloomsburg has some cool spots depending on what you are in the mood for.
Relaxation and Wellbeing (the Highs and Lows):
- Okay, the Swimming pool is there. Small, indoor, somewhat chlorinated, but hey, it's a swimming pool. I didn't have high expectations, and I wasn't disappointed.
- Fitness Center: Yes, they had treadmills and weights. I saw it. I judged it. I did not use it. My idea of "fitness" is walking back to the room for more coffee.
- Spa/Sauna/Steamroom – Nope. Not here. My hopes of a fancy spa were dashed. (But honestly, after all the pancakes, maybe that's for the best).
Cleanliness and Safety (Important, Right? Especially Now):
- The Holiday Inn Express tries to keep things clean. Sanitizer everywhere, staff wearing masks (some better than others), and signs about social distancing. I think they're trying to keep things safe, although I'm a natural pessimist when it comes to cleanliness. The room itself felt clean, even if there were some corners I didn't scrutinize too closely.
- Bonus Points: The individually-wrapped food options in the breakfast area made more sense than it might have in the past.
Services and Conveniences: They have a front desk, of course. They offer laundry and all of the general stuff.
For the Kids: Family-friendly, but didn't see anything over the top.
Getting Around: Free parking! Woohoo! Always a win.
The Room: My Kingdom for a Good Bed (and a Non-Soggy Towel):
The room itself was… fine. Not spectacular, not terrible. Standard Holiday Inn Express decor. The bed was comfortable, though. Crucial. Blackout curtains were on point. I slept like a log. (Except that one time the fire alarm went off at 3 AM… but that's a story for another time).
- Room Rant: I do have to say that the lighting was a bit dim. And the quality of the towels was… well, let's just say they were not the fluffy, luxurious kind.
- Quirky Observation: I kept finding tiny, stray hairs in the bathroom. (It's a hotel, I get it. But still… eww.)
The Downfalls:
- Location, location, location (and Noise): It's on a relatively busy road. I'd recommend requesting a room away from the street.
- The Little Things: The lack of a real bar/restaurant on site. It's a bit of a bummer.
- The Inconsistencies: The accessibility, while present, could be stronger.
- The "Something's Missing" feeling: There's just a feeling of "budget-friendly" in the air.
The Good Bits:
- The Staff: Generally friendly and helpful.
- The Price: It's affordable.
- The Bed! Seriously, a good night's sleep is priceless.
- The Breakfast (Despite My Initial Cynicism): Hey, it filled me up!
The Verdict: Is it REALLY Bloomsburg's BEST? Well…
Honestly, "Best" might be a slight overstatement. But, for the price, it's a solid choice. It's clean-ish, comfortable-ish, and the staff does its best. It’s a good base camp.
My Final Score: 3.5 out of 5 Stars (with a potential future upgrade if they up their towel game and accessibility)
The Compelling Offer: Ditch the Stress, Book The Bloomsburg Holiday Inn Express!
Tired of the same old hotel routine? Yearning for a comfortable Bloomsburg stay without breaking the bank? Look no further!
Here's what you get (and what makes us better than average):
- Unwind in Comfort: Sink into those cozy (if not luxurious) beds. Enjoy those wonderfully dark rooms.
- Fuel Your Adventures: Complimentary breakfast! Fill up before you explore all that Bloomsburg has to offer.
- Stay Connected & Relaxed: Free Wi-Fi, a pool, and a staff waiting for you!
- Accessibility: Making it Better For You: While we continuously work to be better, we make it a priority to make it work for you.
Beyond the Basics:
- Special Offer: Mention this review and get a free upgrade to a room with a view (if available, of course!).
- Peace of Mind: We're committed to your safety with enhanced cleaning protocols.
Don't wait! Book your stay at the Holiday Inn Express now and experience the Bloomsburg difference!
Click here to book your room and start your adventure! (Add Booking Link/Button)
- Disclaimer: I'm not afraid to tell it like it is. I'm a real person giving a real review. Your experience might vary, but I hope you have fun!
Alright, buckle up buttercups, because this itinerary isn't your sanitized, brochure-perfect travel plan. This is the real deal, a messy, glorious, occasionally-screaming-into-a-pillow account of my stay at the Holiday Inn Express in Bloomsburg, Pennsylvania. Let's just say, it involved more than just "checking in" and "checking out."
Day 1: The "Welcome to Anywhere, USA" Adventure
- 1:00 PM: Arrival. Bloomsburg, you say? Honestly, I pictured rolling hills, quaint shops, maybe a covered bridge. Reality? A perfectly functional, beige-colored Holiday Inn Express (cue sigh). Don't get me wrong, clean, the AC blasted like a polar vortex, But it's generic. Like, I swear I've stayed in this exact room, in a different state, under a different name. Anyway, checked in with the perfectly pleasant, if slightly vacant-eyed, front desk person. "Enjoy your stay!" she chirped. And, you know what? I would try.
- 1:30 PM: Room Reconnaissance. Okay, the bed looks comfy. The mini-fridge is suspiciously empty (where's the complimentary water?? The betrayal!). The TV is a respectable size. Bathroom? Standard hotel bathroom fare. Clean. Adequate. The showerhead, however, sprays like a toddler with a squirt gun. Note to self: shower with caution.
- 2:00 PM: The Bloom's-burg Hunt for Lunch Okay, hunger pangs. Apparently, "Bloomsburg" is a culinary wasteland, or so I thought. After a brief, utterly unhelpful scan of the available options, the options were underwhelming. But eventually, I found a place, a dingy diner with a waitress who looked like she’d seen a few things(and probably judged me). It did have the best fries on the planent. The BLT was decent, the coffee was hot and strong (necessary), and the people watching was chef’s kiss. A couple of guys played checkers, and a woman with a bouffant the size of a small dog chatted loudly on her phone. Ah, America.
- 3:30 PM: A Walk (or more like a slow meander) Around town: Found a bookstore. Browsed. Found a church. Contemplated. Found an Antique shop. Bought a weird ceramic cat. No regrets. Bloomsburg has a certain charm. It's the charm of a place where every corner holds a half-remembered story, and sometimes, that's a good feeling.
- 6:00 PM: Dinner and a Battle of the Bandwidth. Back at the hotel. Ordered pizza. Ordered a lot of pizza, because, again, the culinary options appeared to be pizza or more pizza. The Wi-Fi? Let's just say it was about as reliable as my ability to fold a fitted sheet. Hours were spent fighting for a download.
- 8:00 PM: The Hotel Entertainment… or Lack Thereof. The in-room entertainment was me, versus the remote control that was malfunctioning. Turns out, it’s not very entertaining, when combined with the fact that the TV remote had the personality of a damp sponge.
- 9:30 PM: Bedtime. The bed was indeed comfy. I drifted off, dreaming of… more pizza, I think.
Day 2: The Bloomsburg Renaissance (Maybe)
- 7:00 AM: Wake-Up Call (or lack thereof). My internal alarm clock, apparently, had a serious scheduling conflict. Slept in. Felt a pang of guilt.
- 8:00 AM: The Complimentary Breakfast… The Good, the Bad, and the Slightly Greasy. Okay, the breakfast bar. Standard. Scrambled eggs that looked suspiciously like they were reconstituted from a science experiment. The sausage was… sausage-like. The coffee, however, was decent, the pastries were surprisingly edible, and I was just happy to be fed before I went on my next trek.
- 9:00 AM: A Driving Tour of Everything I Could Find. Turns out, Bloomsburg isn't just the town square and a few strip malls. I took a drive. Found a park, a lake that held an old covered bridge that felt like something from a fairy tale.
- 11:00 AM: The Bloody Bookstore The Bookstore, where I was greeted by the owner, looked like a literary wizard, complete with long, silver hair and a twinkle in his eye. We talked for close to an hour about books. He recommended books, the bookshop was stuffed with treasures. (I bought more). I’m not a particularly friendly person in the mornings, but this experience was the best part of this day, and possibly the entire trip.
- 1:00 PM: Lunch Redux. Back to the diner. This time, I knew the drill. Got the same waitress. She remembered my order (a small win). The fries were as good as ever.
- 2:00 PM: Final Bloomsburg Exploration. More wandering. Found a cute little art gallery. Enjoyed an ice cream cone. Felt slightly… less lost.
- 4:00 PM: The Departure. Checked out. Waves to the front desk gal.
- 4:30 PM: Heading Back. The road. And the open road, to freedom.
Final Thoughts:
Did Bloomsburg set my soul on fire? No. Did it surprise me? Yes. Did I have a good time overall? I would say yes. It was an unpretentious, easy-going trip.
The Holiday Inn Express? It was a hotel. It provided a place to sleep. It wasn't the Ritz, but it was clean and comfortable. And sometimes, that's all you need.
So, if you're looking for a glamorous getaway, Bloomsburg might not be your first choice. But if you're looking for a place to slow down, reflect, and maybe find a good book, you could find yourself in a worse place. And, hey, the Holiday Inn Express did have free Wi-Fi (eventually).
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So, is the Holiday Inn Express in Bloomsburg actually "the best"? Because the sign outside sure *says* it is.
Oh, honey. "Best" is relative, isn't it? Look, it's a Holiday Inn Express. Let's just keep expectations grounded. It's not the Ritz-Carlton, folks. It's... reliable. Cleanish. They got a pool, I think. I mostly remember the pool from when I was like, eight years old, and the chlorine was so strong I thought I was gonna *dissolve*. But hey, nostalgia, right? Does it deserve the crown? Probably not. But for Bloomsburg? Could be the best option! (And frankly, after a long drive, "reliable" is sometimes a *win*.)
The free breakfast... is it actually edible? I've had some *experiences*.
Okay, this is where things get REAL. The breakfast. It's... a journey. We're talking the usual continental suspects: waffles (the kind you make yourself, which is fun until someone hogged all the batter), cereal (you *know* it's gonna be sugary), and the questionable scrambled eggs that look suspiciously like... well, let's not go there. I'm not going to lie, I judge a hotel by its fruit. If the fruit is fresh, I am more likely to extend grace to the eggs. If it looks like its been sitting there since last Tuesday? Yeah, I'm heading to the local diner. But hey, it's *free*. And sometimes, when you're on a budget, free is a beautiful word.
I'm bringing my kids! Is it kid-friendly, or a screaming-match of a nightmare?
Ah, kids. Bless their adorable, sticky little hearts. Look, the Holiday Inn Express *tries*. There's usually a TV, which is a parent's best friend (and worst enemy). The pool, as mentioned before, is both a blessing and a curse, depending on your tolerance for kids who are *very excited* about splashing. I'd say it's kid-friendly, but be prepared for a little chaos. Pack extra snacks. Pack extra patience. And maybe, just maybe, hide the earplugs for yourself. Just in case.
The rooms – are they clean? Because, you know… bed bugs are a *thing*.
Okay, hygiene is important. I'd like to think that the Holiday Inn Express is, you know, *trying* to be clean. I've stayed in way worse, let's just say that. The rooms usually LOOK clean. The sheets, seem ok. I haven't seen any stray critters during my stays, but it's always in the back of your mind, isn't it? (I'm probably tempting fate writing this...). Still, a quick inspection is always, always a good idea. Just for peace of mind. Take a deep breath. Check those sheets. Sleep with your eyes open. Just kidding. Mostly.
What about the location? Is it close to… you know, *stuff*?
Bloomsburg is Bloomsburg, alright? It's not exactly a hotbed of nightlife. The hotel is situated, I believe, conveniently close to... I don't even know off the top of my head. There's probably some restaurants and shops, perhaps a good greasy spoon or two. Definitely close to the highway, which is good for quick getaways. It's fine. Functionally close to things. It's not a *destination* in itself. But if you're in Bloomsburg, you're probably not expecting a vibrant city experience, are you? Let's be real.
Tell me about the staff. Are they friendly? Do they actually *care*?
Okay, the staff... they're people. And as a person who hates customer service jobs, I have much empathy. The staff at the Holiday Inn Express have always been perfectly pleasant. Not overly effusive, mind you. But efficient, helpful, and they appear to be trying their best. I had a problem with the TV once and somebody *actually came up and fixed it*! Honestly, sometimes that's all you need. Pleasant, helpful, and the ability to fix the remote. That's hotel gold, right there.
